The What Kind of College Student Are You Test

1. Hi! Welcome to my What Kind of College Student Are You Test. I'll be using advanced logic and knowledge to determine your true nature.
   The following questions will do a fun analysis of what kind of college student you would be. Even if you are in college, headed to college, done with it, or never went or will go, it should prove to be a good time.
   Shall we begin?
2. 1

   You are applying to schools. What do you do to prepare for the application process, where do you end up applying, and what is your first choice?

   I did minor research online and went to a counselor. I have a sizeable list, but no clear favorite. I just want a degree.

   I don't need to do research. I've been working my ass off and intend to get into (Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Stanford, etc.) or my life is over!!!

   I'm not bothering. My parents have pretty much picked out a place for me that will accept my mediocre grades and are paying for it. I'm going to go through the motions until I graduate.

   ...Research? What's that? PARTY!!!!!!!!!

3. 2

   You just got an acceptance letter in the mail. What is your reaction?

   Oh, thank God! Now my parents will get off my ass. Now I can slack off until I move into the dorms this summer.

   I got in! I GOT IN! THANK THE LORD, I GOT IN!!!!!!!

   Man, this school's got good parties! AWESOME!

   This school has good financial aid, but I'll keep my options open until I hear from other places.

4. 3

   You're preparing for the beginning of your first semester. What are you up to?

   Um, I guess I'll buy some sheets and shit at Walmart for the dorms. I need somewhere to crash between hang overs.

   I'll buy the bare essentials and compare prices. I'm only living in the dorms 3/4's of the year. Doesn't mean I can't save money!

   I don't care, My parents are buying whatever I pull off the shelves at IKEA for my dorm. I can't believe I have to SHARE a ROOM! Lame.

   I'm going all out! This is my dream school! My home away from home!!!

5. 4

   Move in time. How do you feel?

   Ecstatic! I've been waiting so long, and now I'm here!!!

   Where's the keg, dude?!

   It's HOW long to wait for the elevators? This fuckin' sucks!

   This is pretty nifty. I can't wait to start going through orientation materials once I get all settled in!

6. 5

   So, you made it through to the end of the semester and you're going home for Winter break. How do you feel?

   Well, my parents are probably going to be pissed that my grades aren't so great, but seriously, I don't care. I just want to lie around and hang with friends before I have to go back to that hell hole.

   Oh, man, what's academic probation? My dad's gonna pissed. Plus, the parties at home SUCK!

   My grades could have been better, but I did my best and enjoyed the last semester. Now I can go home to work and get some money for the next semester.

   I'm a little disillusioned that this school isn't everything I thought it would be, but I still have bragging rights when I go home! I'm Ivy League now, ASSHOLES!!!

Finished!