The Space Adventures in Sector Zed Test

1. 

2. This test is a space adventure and a puzzle. You first choose your crew of brave spacefarers that will accompany you into the depths of unexplored space. Then you will experience a series of episodic adventures. On each adventure, you will have to choose how to handle a crisis. How good these choices are depends on the team you selected. Without a doubt, you will need some balance of might, scientific prowess, and diplomacy to make it back home alive.

   Achieving victory will be hard, but there is no single crew or solution in order to achieve a success...

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   You have just been commissioned by the United Planet Starmada to captain the starship U.P.S. Metatron. Your mission is to explore the uncharted territory of Sector Zed, a place where few have entered and none have returned. You'll face dangers needing scientific expertise, a smooth diplomatic nature, and a willingness to blast stuff into a fine granulated powder. Are you up to the challenge? If so, it is time to select your crew!

3. 1

   Your crew will help determine how you should approach the situations that naturally arise in exploring space. First, you clearly need a second-in-command. Who will you choose from the many excellent candidates?

   Mr. Mephistopholes, a master tactician and borderline homocidal maniac.

   Hard-Drive, the loveable robot who has answers to all science's mysteries, but longs for the ability to understand low-brow humor.

   Counselor Beta, the ship's resident sexy, if duplicitous, peacenik.

   Dr. MacGuffin, a know-it-all do-it-all kind of guy.

4. 2

   Though it's a practice frowned upon by Starmada brass, you know taking along an alien officer will probably prove useful. Who will it be?

   Mahatma Zork, an intelligent and gentle, halo-wearing alien and the last of his species.

   Zormag-Fido, shape-shifting alien who spends half his time as a giant bone-crunching ogre and the other half as a loveable beagle.

   Grphlatffx, the humanoid slime mold who if she cannot resolve a problem scientifically, just eats whatever is offending her.

5. 3

   You will also need a crew of totally dispensible worker bees. The kind of people you can get to drink the water first, or have step through the laser guarded gate, or you can feed to a giant blob. How will you distribute their skill sets?

   Forty science officers, thirty tactical officers, and twenty Starmada diplomats.

   Forty tactical officers, thirty Starmada diplomats, and twenty science officers.

   Forty Starmada diplomats, thirty science officers, and twenty tactical officers.

6. 4

   Unfortunately, The Starmada regulations require you take someone "unqualified for anything" who will be a liability and almost certainly get you all killed. Who will it be?

   Colonel Bligh, the permanently drunk officer who can't help but embarrass you as he accuses everyone you meet of being Cylons.

   Princely, the teenager who thinks he is an officer and keeps setting off explosions in engineering.

   "Captain" Janeway, the woman claiming to be from the deep future who has delusions that she is a starship captain. Sheesh... I mean, everyone knows women can't be starship captains, right?

7. Now that you have your crew, you are almost on your way! But keep in mind that if and when you return you will be judged based on your actions. The Golden Rule of the United Planet Starmada clearly states: Do not interfere with unknown alien cultures and life forms. Yeah, like you are going to care about that when you're halfway down the throat of a sandworm!

   Can you make it back safely based on the crew you chose? Can you make it back without violating regulations? Let the exploration begin!

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