The INTERNET DATING Test

1. Welcome to Internet Dates Tact and Humor Test.
2. 1

   You are on a blind date and you choose to meet the person in a public place. Your date shows up with a white ring around his mouth. How would you handle this?

   Make a joke and ask if he were sucking on a Mylanta bottle?

   Make an excuse and leave.

   Grab something and wipe his mouth then use it for a makeshift bib!

   Try to ignore it and kiss him (holding back from gagging).

3. 2

   You meet someone from an inernet dating site. You accept a date for dinner and your date does the driving to the restaurant. On the way, your date pulls an oxygen-like mask from under the drivers seat and begins breathing into it. You inquire if he is okay and he states yes, it's something that law-enforement is making me do as part of my DUI sentence. Do you...

   Quickly and carefully jump from the vehicle from the next red light and walk to your car?

   Ask him politely to let you out of the car?

   Offer him a beer (you want test the breathalizer).

   Carry on with the date and pray that the evening goes quickly!

4. 3

   You meet the person of your dreams. You both have lots in common spend alot of time together. You think he might ask you to marry him when he calls the one night and drops a bomb that he is married. Do you..

   drop him like a rock and have no contact with the knucklehead!

   Call his wife

   Forgive him for the lies and offer to be friends with benefits?

   Declare the more the merrier and invite her to join in!

5. 4

   You are on a third date with someone and the person brings up the issue of sex and begins groping. You would like to know this person emotionally and intellectually before moving on and you tell him that. He ignores you. Do you...

   Tell him what a loser he is, slap him and leave?

   Give him the benefit of the doubt, figuring that his fresh shipment of Viagara has arrived.

   Give in

   Offer to give his number to 900-phone-sex.

6. 5

   You have a nice dinner planned with your date, family and a few friends. All seems to be going great that evening. The next day, your phone is ringing off the hook with your family/friends calling and warning you to drop your date immediately! They offer no explanation, but the following evening you happen to catch the show America's Most Wanted. The show describes a bigamist and displays a blurry photo. You immediately recognize the person in the photo to be you boyfriend. Do you...

   Call the toll free number and turn the bum in? Then call family/friends and thank them?

   Try to talk him into surrendering.

   Call all the wives and invite them for an orgy

   Ignore all and continue the relationship

7. 6

   You receive email from this guy that you met on an internet dating site. He invites you for coffee and you meet him at the mall. The conversation is going well until he begins asking about your income and your assets. Do you....

   Counter questions with questions

   Open your heart and write him a check

   Answer all that he asks

   Thank him for his concern, but you would rather change the subject.

8. 7

   You have been seeing a guy for about a month. All of your dates have been great, but McDonalds and Wendy's are getting old. You ask if you can try this new restaurant and your guy declares that he isn't made of money and is on Social Security Disability. He wants you to pay for it. Do you...

   Call the restaurant for a menu (to check the prices) then your shrink to talk you outta this!

   Look in the mirror and notice the label on your forehead "meal ticket"

   Stay home and cook if he offers to pay half for groceries

   Say buh bye!

9. 8

   You take an offer to meet in person, a guy from an internet dating site. You are late for the date and when you arrive your date is in the parking lot waiting. You get out of the car and lock your keys in the car. You laugh about it but, you are in a panic. You ask the waiter at the restaurant for a coat hanger to break into your car and you end up in the parking lot for 45 minutes getting a lesson on breaking into your own car. Your date remains in the restaurant and isn't offering to help. You finally retrieve your keys and return to the restaurant a little upset that your date doesn't practice chivary. You want to say something, but you...

   Laugh it off and be grateful that you saw an unexpected side of this guy.

   Chalk it up to another loser and make the best of the evening.

   Direct the rest of the evening's conversation towards chivary and how you admire guys that practice it.

   Ask the waiter for a date ;o)

Finished!