The How Much Ass Do You Kick Test

1. Do you think you kick enough ass to take my test? Probably not, but your lame ass will take it anyway huh? Are you a pirate or a pussy, take me to find out.
2. 1

   Ok you're back in high school and a bully starts to pick on you, he pushes you down hard, you....

   Try to start a fight with him

   Question his manhood

   Run away

   Be the bigger man and key the fuck out of his car

3. 2

   Now you are in college, on your way back to the dorms you encounter a group of liberal dickweeds protesting the war or something lame, you...

   Stand on something and tell everyone to shut the fuck up and go home

   Ignore it and walk away

   Tell everyone that it doesn't matter about the war and that bush is a fucking retard anyway

   Drive your car really fast towards the crowd and stop just in the nick of time (or not)

4. 3

   Your grandparent is dying. You never really knew him/her but they still are related, upon visiting you find that he/she has quite a bit of money. Do you...

   Let him/her be they never knew you and probably be best if they didn't get attached

   Befriend them in their time of need

   Totally fake it and attempt to become great buddies as to get yourself in that will!

   Steal they money, they're practically blind anyhow.

5. 4

   Your long lost friend is having a party, apparently a lot of people you grew up with will be there, you...

   Decide to catch up with old friends.

   Decide to show how much more your life kicks ass without them

   Lie and say you're incredibly successful

   Show up drunk and insult everyone, and maybe even sleep with someone

6. 5

   Ok here's an easy one, everyone wins, well almost. Are you Donny Osmond?

   Yes

   No

7. 6

   What's your favorite movie?

   Die Hard

   The Notebook

   Army of Darkness

   Nightmare Before Christmas

8. 7

   How scary are you? (Both Physically and psychologically)

   I'm huge and dumb

   I'm skinny and a wuss

   I'm Large and demented

   I'm small and scary

9. 8

   Are you part of any liberal groups? Greenpeace and the like?

   Yes

   No

10. 9

    Ok now the most important question of all, ninjas or pirates?

    Ninjas

    Pirates

    No thanx, i'm a wuss

11. 10

    Some kids are playing in your yard, you see one accidently break something (bush, flower, lawn gnome etc.), you...

    Go out and ask for their parents

    Tell the kids that you'll kill them

    Throw rocks at the kids

    Break his bike and throw it at him

12. 11

    you blast your "music" in what kind of car:

    oversized unessicary F250 so high you need a step stool to get up in it. You make up for your lack of everything else with an oversized "macho" truck.

    shitty old rustbucket, with an equally shitty soundsystem that rapes the bass line from "another one bites the dust" to unreconizable.

    your second shiny nice new sports car your overly rich father bestowed upon you. you wrecked the first one turning left on a green light, thinking it was a green arrow. dumbass.

    A stupid hippie van that you and your cool friends smoke weed out of on the weekends

13. 12

    What sort of Music do you listen to?

    LinKiN pArK

    Brittany Spears

    Jimi Hendrix

    Snoop Dogg

14. 13

    Do you pop your collar?

    LOL, yes. Like an Abercrombie model. Smokin'.

    like Elvis.

    No. I speak out against all forms of pop culture. anarchy. rock on with your "hardcore" self.

    Collared shirts are for pussies.

15. 14

    Have you ever visited The Best Page in the Universe?

    Yes

    No

    Regularly

    please.... WWW.Maddox.xmission.com

16. 15

    Did you vote for Bush?

    Yes

    No

    Bush is an idiot, ANARCHY!!!

    I don't vote

Finished!