The How Ghetto Are Your Neighbors Test

1. Hi! And welcome to my How Ghetto Are Your Neighbors Test, a test for those who have neighbors from hell--I feel your pain.
2. 1

   Okay, its 10 p.m. on a weekday, what do you hear?

   Hardly anything, its nice and quiet.

   A little bit of noise but nothing to go crazy about

   Keyboard, drums and spanish jibberish.

   Gunshots

3. 2

   Out of all these scenarios, what can you possibly see (or have already seen) occurring in your 'hood?

   Drive by

   Two nuclear families living in a single bedroom apartment

   Make-shaft cock fights every Friday night

   WTF?

4. 3

   Do you worry about your car at night?

   Yes

   No

5. 4

   Laundry day! How do your neighbors normally dry their clothes?

   In a dryer....duh?

   On their balcony

   On the fence/wall

   On YOUR space

6. 5

   Can you leave anything outside, unlocked? If yes, skip the next question.

   Yes

   No, my freakin' neighbors will take them

7. 6

   Poor you, you can't trust your own neighbors, join the club. What has been taken by or alledgedly by your neighbors?

   Door mat/laundry bag/laundry detergent/outdoor decor

   Clothes/bike/ hubcaps/rims

   Car

   Combination of the choices above (wow sucks to be you!)

8. 7

   How many of your neighbors can NOT speak english at all?

   All speak english to a degree

   About half speak english to a degree

   Er...about more half CAN'T speak english

   I'm the only english speaking person in the complex (que lastima!)

9. 8

   Alright your neighbor is having a party, where at?

   In their apartment

   Outside on the common grass

   Outside in the carports

   Outside in the common grass/carports AND your space

10. 9

    Have your neighbors ever participated in the following in the wee hours? If not, skip the question.

    Very loud ho-down

    Very loud quincinera

    Very loud sex

    Very loud something, just not mentioned

11. 10

    Do your neighbors kids rough house to the point where you have to take control of the situation? (in other words do your neighbors let their kids run wild?)

    Yes

    No

12. 11

    You tell your neighbors at 2 a.m. a friendly shut the fuck up, they....

    shut the fuck up

    tell YOU to shut the fuck up

    Vandalize your shit

    Attempt to shoot you

13. 12

    Have there ever been nights where you've said to yourself (or others)....

    I love my neighbors

    This is a good place to live

    Please excuse my neighbors, they are ghetto

    I fucking HATE my neighbors!

14. 13

    Because of your neighbors and your neighbors ONLY, how many times have you thought about moving?

    None

    Once or twice

    Three or six

    haha, more than six

15. 14

    Have your neighbors ever set their apartment (or anybody elses) on fire because of a meth lab explosion?

    Yes

    No

16. 15

    The state of your apartment complex a few days after grounds-keeping...

    Relatively nice

    Cigarette butts, generic trash

    Empty cans of cat food, cigarette butts, more generic trash

    gross--trash all over the damn place, freakin pigs

Finished!